I speak French as a first language, though my French sounds more and more Frenglishy with all the years that pass.
French is a super useful language because not as many people speak it around these parts as they do Spanish. So whenever there's a problem or a socially awkward situation going on, I can revert to French with my family.
A fond family tradition passed down from one generation to the next in my family is switching to French to shout thinly-veiled threats to kids who are not following parent directions.
My son does not speak a whole lot of French, but he understands it well. It brings back an adorable anecdote from his first visit to a public restroom (this one at the library) when he was a wee lad.
Dear Son (in the middle of the library, loudly in semi-English): Mommy! Me want to go poopoo in library toilette!
Me (in French): OK. OK, let's go!
(We walk into the bathroom and start the "keep your hands off everything!" routine.
Another woman walks in and sits down in the next stall. She starts grunting and straining loudly . I am not making this up.)
Dear Son (Eng): Hey, Mommy! Look! Look at me poopoo! That's a BIIIIIIIIGGGGG one!"
Me (Fr.): Shhhh! Yes! Very big. But shhhh. Not everyone wants to hear about your poopoo.
Dear Son (more loudly, in Eng.): Hey, look at all this peepee me make! All this yellow peepee in this toilet and this big poopoo!
Me (cringing, Fr.): Yes. Shh. Remember, we don't need to talk about that when we're out somewhere.
(Lady next to us starts grunting more loudly)
Dear Son (looking shocked, loudly in Eng.): Mommy!! What that sound!?
Me (English, loudly): That's you peeing, silly! (Fr.) Don't say anything! Don't say anything else while we're in this bathroom, ok!?
Dear Son (Eng): OK! Why!? Why, Mommy!? (tries to look under the bathroom stall with his pants around his ankles... I yank him up)
(We exit the stall and I wash his hands. Lady behind us starts pushing and breathing rhythmically as if ready to deliver a child.)
Dear Son (whirling around and gaping at the stall door): Mommy!! WHAT....
Me (interrupting, Fr.): Remember what I said!! NO talking right now!! Don't say anything until we leave the bathroom!!!"
Dear Son complies.
Honestly, I'd say that went as reasonably well as one could expect.
I used to teach French to middle schoolers. They liked learning a secret spy language they could use to talk to each other about secret stuff no one was trying to overhear.
Today, I created a thing on Teachers Pay Teachers. It's a color-by-French-IR-verb-conjugations. It's better for older kids. My students love color-by-anythings!
Bargain basement price of $2.50 in my Teachers Pay Teachers store!
Comments
Post a Comment